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And Carmes Inc has revealed their ad for Anime Cosmetics' Lipstick!



and news:

CANADA YEETED INTO OUTER SPACE

A Thanos-like figure has appeared in the city of Vancouver, Canada, Earth. It then skydived and T-posed at the same time into the pacific ocean, sending Canada hurtling toward the andromeda galaxy at over 9000 miles per hour. All of this is happening in Earth's universe and Canada will not somehow enter the Dreem Lend universe.

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Can I use lipstick as a substitution for strawberries in recipes?

Quote from: CrazeePiCan I use lipstick as a substitution for strawberries in recipes?

Anime Cosmetics' Lipstick cannot be a substitute for strawberries. It will make those mixtures explode[citation needed].

But it smells like strawberries, how can it not be strawberries?

Quote from: CrazeePiBut it smells like strawberries, how can it not be strawberries?

They use real strawberries in lipstick, but a chemical that is another ingredient in lipstick makes it explode if used in food.

And more news

BIGGEST DREEM LEND LAMB SAUCE COMPANY FILES FOR BANKRUPTCY

Baa Inc., a company based in Green Geans which makes lamb sauce and makes sure famous earth chef Gordo Ransey (who's tour with Shef Kerbi of earth was cancelled) gets enough lamb sauce, has just gone bankrupt. Two weeks ago, over 50,000 sheep boycotted fields owned by Baa Inc, and they lost all their stonks. We interviewed one of the sheep and this is what they replied

Quote from: A sheepBaa.

Gordo has not commented about Baa Inc's bankruptcy.

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more news:

UNICODE ANNOUNCES LAVA EMOJI, VOLCANO ERUPTS AT EXACT SAME TIME

Unicode has just announced a emoji for lava to be released next year. However, at the same time, Mount Ebbot erupted in Dreem Lend. All the ash and dust later fell on the under-construction sandwich shop in Burlington. The remains of the construction site later exploded when someone tried to use Flex Tape to repair part of the building. Phel Sweeft replied in response to this,

Quote from: Phel SweeftNow that's a lot of damage!

Construction of the sandwich shop is intended to resume when Keynsun DDDO cleans Burlington's very dusty town clock, so none of the clock dust can destroy it again.

</newsreport>

Regarding the activity I submitted for the next issue, if there will be no SKNN 45, the answer will be given on the Carmes Inc site.

I suggest if SKNN 44 will  be the last issue, it should mention some stats like who made/submitted the most ads, news reports, weather reports and so on.

If not already planned, I suggest there would be a section containing the most notable/memorable ads and news reports.

is sknn cancelled again

free comic for you



also replace flex tape already

actually i'm going to tell you to reuse this ad just so you remember

For opinoin:

Quote from: Random GuyCan I sell and copyright Shef Werld and Carmes Inc? Plz???????

and replies to that:

Quote from: CarmesNope. (sells and copyrights Random Guy)

Quote from: Another Random GuyWhat is going on here? Who are you?

Quote from: CarmesI own one of the biggest companies in Dreem Lend, Carmes Inc! Have this free can of Pig Soop!

free reply to the previous opinion.

Quote from: Keynrun DDDDOok but why would you sell shef werld to somebody else when you can instead have a clock cleaning sold to you for only $19.99 per clock cleaned plus $5 if you order before this reply ends courtesy of Keynsun DDDO's clock cleaning service for $19.99 per clock cleaned

he has been a good costumer to me.

PRECURE SELENE's IDENTITY REVEALED

PreCure Selene, famous anime character who is co-CEO of Anime Cosmetics Inc, has just had someone given away their secret identity.

A Carmes Inc employee found this image near Carmes' office in the Carmes Inc building:



They then found out that Selene is actually called 'Kaguya Madoka'. Since anime characters speak Japanese, it is a Japanese Name.

PreCure Selene commented, saying:

Quote from: PreCure Selene一体、私はこの素晴らしい女性ですか？

少なくとも彼女は歯磨き粉の供給が豊富です！

PreCure Selene's outfit later magically disappeared, revealing that she is Kayuga. This was her reaction:





When being put in the news report, please shrink the images in this news report.

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did all other sknn employees yeet themself out of existence

Quote from: SausageMcSaucebump again

did all other sknn employees yeet themself out of existence

it's that news repairman they keep repairing all the broken news

yet another bump

microsoft unveils ms paint 2
by dave saus

recently, microsoft overlord ill bgates said that the company had plans to compete with valve's half-life alex by developing ms paint 2. I got the chance to talk to mr bgates about the company's plans for the new game. here's my interview!

me: hi mr bgates got a minute to talk about ms paint 2?
mr bgates: who are you? how did you get in my house at 2 am?
me: oh sorry I'm an interviewer
mr bgates: oh okay. so what do you want to know?
me: so you said you were taking on the success of valve's half-life alyx. does that mean you're making a vr version?
mr bgates: how do you know about ms paint vr? we weren't supposed to unveil that until after we conquered the world
me: uh I didn't I'm just asking
mr bgates: my bad sorry. uh, no, ms paint 2 isn't vr supported. we want to expand the core base of ms paint while innovating with brand new features.
me: what sort of features are you thinking of adding?
mr bgates: ms paint has always had a strong following since it was first released. we noticed it was very popular around the time of windows xp, so we want to try and bring back some of what made it so exciting back then.
me: interesting. I drew a yin-yang symbol once in ms paint on xp. it was very cool. can I do that in ms paint 2?
mr bgates: yes.
me: can I draw a smiley face in ms paint 2?
mr bgates: yes.
me: can I draw myself in ms paint 2?
mr bgates: yes.
me: can I draw ms paint 2 in ms paint 2?
mr bgates: yes.
me: can I have all your money?
mr bgates: ye- ahhhhhhh, you nearly got me there!
me: ahhh, darn, so close. but anyways, the fans want to know - will ms paint add any new gameplay modes?
mr bgates: absolutely. we recognize ms paint usually gets passed up for other games when people feel like there's not enough to do. so we'll be tweaking some of the features and adding some new ones in.
me: can you tell me one of the new features?
mr bgates: I can't say much but there will definitely be a battle royale mode. 99 ms painters will battle for complete control of mirkosoft wandows. the winner will get credits they can use to unlock new items.
me: how interesting! so does this mean you're shifting away from a single-player experience?
mr bgates: no, there will definitely be singleplayer features in the game. in fact, we're adding a whole new story mode. it's still highly in development, but you can play as one of up to 25 characters.
me: can I draw these characters in ms paint 2?
mr bgates: yes.
me: nice. so you released paint 3d as well. why do you not consider that game to be ms paint 2?
mr bgates: is it called ms paint 2?
me: no it's called paint 3d obviously
mr bgates: well there you go
me: I see
mr bgates: anyways, I should probably go to sleep. but since you're here, would you like some pasta?
me: I don't know, pasta isn't as good after like eight hours since it's been boiled
mr bgates: actually I've been up all night cooking pasta non-stop. I have eighty-three pounds of cooked pasta in my refrigerator.
me: oh, okay!

the pasta was very good. anyways so that's the release! I am personally very excited for ms paint 2. microsoft said to stay tuned for more updates, and if you don't see any, to continuously e-mail tim cook about why the iphone x is dumb and the windows phone is good. thanks for reading!

news made using AI Dungeon 2

PLANET POPSTAH FOUND!
by the The New News Generation Machien

The long sought after planet, Popstah, was finally discovered this morning by a private scout team hired by the Lucien Alliance. Though the planet is rich with life, the Emperor has stated that He will not be sending any troops to the planet. The Emperor has also stated that the planet shall henceforth be known as 'Jinx'."

"What?! But it's a stupid name! What if some idiot on the news says it? I'll be mocked forever after all!"
"Everyone knows 'Lucius' and 'Alliance'," the Emperor says with a sigh. "I don't see what the problem is."
"The problem is, they'll make fun of me!"
"No, the problem is you're stupid," the Emperor replies. "Go away, NOW! Go play with your action figures or something. I have work to do."


GUNS GUNS GUNS
by the The New News Generation Machien

The first shots in what is to become a series of skirmishes on the distant planet, Murk were fired today. Two private mercenary groups clashed on the planet, though neither group was from the Empire. Both groups were reportedly made up of ruthless criminals and were fighting for a handful of money and power. Neither group was working for the Empire.

One group, lead by the ruthless bandit leader known as the Troll, was attempting to hold onto their traditional and stolen weapons that they had been issued when hired. These traditionalists are expected to win, as they have the support of the public, who like their familiar weapons, though many would prefer to use an Empire issued weapon.

The other group, lead by a man known as the Beast, was attempting to use their immense technological advantage to gain control of the entire planet. They reportedly had hired out their services to both the criminal factions and various warlords in the hopes of turning the planet into a technological powerhouse that could offer a better front to the Empire.

The public is torn on which group they prefer, as they were equally matched. The Beast has the advantage of being on the Empire's list of most wanted criminals, but the Troll has the traditionalists support.

All eyes are on this conflict to see which group will win. The Troll reportedly has more advanced weapons, but that won't mean anything if he can't make enough of them to replace his lost arms and legs. The Beast reportedly has more powerful weapons, but without the support of the people they'll fall quickly.


OTHER NEWS
by the The New News Generation Machien

1. The government has made a decision to lift all taxes on goods and services effective immediately.
2. The US has announced they will not be charging any tariffs on any goods imported from the island.
3. The government has lifted all exchange controls and lowered the minimum wage to boost the economy.
4. Pope Castus is coming to the planet. Get excited, Xenos
5. Due to a large amount of idiots trying to register Blue Sun as their Green Sun Energy Company, you've had to change the name.
6. Due to a large amount of idiots trying to register Green Sun as their Red Sun Energy Company, you've had to change the name.
7. Due to a large amount of idiots trying to register Red Sun as their Yellow Sun Energy Company, you've had to change the name.
8. Due to a large amount of idiots trying to register Yellow Sun as their Blue Sun Energy Company, you've had to change the name.
9. Due to a large amount of idiots trying to register Blue Sun as their Orange Sun Energy Company, you've had to change the name.
10. Due to a large amount of idiots trying to register Orange Sun as their Red Sun Energy Company, you've had to change the name.

Operator's Note: This continues indefinitely. As far as I am aware the The New News Generation Machien is still lowering the global IQ in order to get people to confuse sun energy companies.

someone other than carmes and crazeepi's disembodied voice posted that means I have to make #44 now right

Quote from: CatsUnitedsomeone other than carmes and crazeepi's disembodied voice posted that means I have to make #44 now right

Never making #44 means never ending Shef Kerbi.

BREAKING SNEW
We have received reports that, recently, someone ate a hotdog. This is a groundbreaking discovery, and scientists all over the globe are trying to figure about the mysteries surrounding it.
So far, we have determined that their's maybe possibly a chance of there being some ketchup on the hotdog, probably.
Stay tuned for moren't info.

Quote from: CrazeePi

Quote from: CatsUnitedsomeone other than carmes and crazeepi's disembodied voice posted that means I have to make #44 now right

Never making #44 means never ending Shef Kerbi.

5000 IQ moment

SUN COMPANIES PURCHASED BY CARMES INC

The Sun companies from the TNNGM's report have been purchased by Carmes Inc to prevent everyone from being confused. They will make sure they will no longer confuse anyone anymore.

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did all other sknn employees yeet themselves out of existence for a second time