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Shef Kerbi News Network

Started by CatsUnited, Sep 22, 2018, 05:22:47 PM

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the2000

#551
officers brutally killed to death by bon starbuckle impostor!!!
written by Apple the Cat
A few officers and a hostage negotiator were killed to death this evening by a Bon Starbuckle imposter. "THIS IS CLEARLY [AN IMPOSTOR OF BON STARBUCKLE] WITH A GREEN HA[T!!!!!]", said the hostage negotiator moments before getting deathed by the aforementioned imposter. Shef Kerbi's team is currently tracking down the impostor, and not the police, because they're all dead. Find out more in the next edition of SKNN!



edit: okay other people, it's up to you to decide which article is better.
also...
Dear Bon,
can you do an improv Gornfeld strip for me?
Sincerely, a Gornfeld fan
wasteof - the game of joining the game continues

<-- This is my friend dan. we are good chums
DAN FACT OF THE DAY: dan can only count to six on his hands

the2000

can you guys say if my article or Zeke's is the better one
wasteof - the game of joining the game continues

<-- This is my friend dan. we are good chums
DAN FACT OF THE DAY: dan can only count to six on his hands

Joyous Theta

#553
Hey guys, I just got back from cleaning clocks and why is that john gameman guy shouting in front of a bunch of dead police men out front?

john gameman is dancing near the corpses shouting "i am john gameman i am porfessional gamae and man man this is yuk pleas clean this youk where is a janitor i am john gameman profesonal game and man man i am not a janitor i am john gameman i am good at dance but also yuck"

Quote from: the2000
Quote from: CrazeePihey the2000 can i copy the about section from your website for something? thanks.
for what

i was thinking about making a wikia for shef kerbi but idk if i'm feeling up to it right now

the2000

#554
Quote from: CrazeePii was thinking about making a wikia for shef kerbi but idk if i'm feeling up to it right now
wow sure

edit: i know a thing or two about making front pages and styling wikias, maybe let me do that?
wasteof - the game of joining the game continues

<-- This is my friend dan. we are good chums
DAN FACT OF THE DAY: dan can only count to six on his hands

Blunderbus

#555
Quote from: the2000officers brutally killed to death by bon starbuckle impostor!!!
written by Apple the Cat
A few officers and a hostage negotiator were killed to death this evening by a Bon Starbuckle imposter. "THIS IS CLEARLY [AN IMPOSTOR OF BON STARBUCKLE] WITH A GREEN HA[T!!!!!]", said the hostage negotiator moments before getting deathed by the aforementioned imposter. Shef Kerbi's team is currently tracking down the impostor, and not the police, because they're all dead. Find out more in the next edition of SKNN!



edit: okay other people, it's up to you to decide which article is better.
yours

EDIT: also do you think maybe you should get rid of some of the employees who haven't done anything in like 2 months? (like TAPAP and w a l u i g i who haven't really done anything other than sign up iirc)
join Fragmented Future to RIDE A TRAIN! WOOOOOOO YEAH, TRAINS, BABY!

the2000

Quote from: DaEpikDudeyours
okay then, if you say so, just write something like "don't use this one" before yours.

I asked Smiley100P if they wanted to use TAPAP and they just told me to boot them, so i guess do it.
wasteof - the game of joining the game continues

<-- This is my friend dan. we are good chums
DAN FACT OF THE DAY: dan can only count to six on his hands

findanegg

Ask Bon And Bon's Cat
Dear Bon,
can you do an improv Gornfeld strip for me?
Sincerely, a Gornfeld fan

sure kiddo. here ya goes

(part 2 coming soon)
She/they, likes collecting Stamps and playing runescape. Veteran of the Sandwich War.

the2000

Quote from: findaneggAsk Bon And Bon's Cat
Dear Bon,
can you do an improv Gornfeld strip for me?
Sincerely, a Gornfeld fan

sure kiddo. here ya goes

(part 2 coming soon)
wow gee thanks, can you crop it and shrink it like the other ones though, the newsletter's big enough as it is
wasteof - the game of joining the game continues

<-- This is my friend dan. we are good chums
DAN FACT OF THE DAY: dan can only count to six on his hands

the2000

#559
teaser: the four new tabs will probably be activities, wiki, ask bon, and games, although activities might not happen because of the lack of interest for it.

update: activities is being merged with games, have any ideas for another tab? wiki will lead to the joke 404 page until crazeepi makes a wiki or doesn't
wasteof - the game of joining the game continues

<-- This is my friend dan. we are good chums
DAN FACT OF THE DAY: dan can only count to six on his hands

findanegg

Quote from: the2000
Quote from: findaneggsnippy snippy
wow gee thanks, can you crop it and shrink it like the other ones though, the newsletter's big enough as it is
(sorry i was at school and could only find a crappy image editor)
She/they, likes collecting Stamps and playing runescape. Veteran of the Sandwich War.

Joyous Theta

#561
nevermind i'm tired and don't know what i was thinking. i'm taking a hopefully temporary break feel free to not pay me. it's probably better to just use the site instead and pretend i never said anything about a wiki. why do we even need a wiki anyway this is a small forum thing.

the2000

Quote from: CrazeePinevermind i'm tired and don't know what i was thinking. i'm taking a hopefully temporary break feel free to not pay me. it's probably better to just use the site instead and pretend i never said anything about a wiki. why do we even need a wiki anyway this is a small forum thing.
okay then, now i need ideas for two new sections of the website. also there will be no ads page.
wasteof - the game of joining the game continues

<-- This is my friend dan. we are good chums
DAN FACT OF THE DAY: dan can only count to six on his hands

Joyous Theta

#563
An employees page?
Link to MotW?
idk

realicraft

it sure is 43.250.142.151       tbgforums.com time, i think
ewow status: 1a has released yet; voting has ended
videos | FS3 | FS3 Wiki | Ratings | Calendar | Universe Manager 2 | Sandbox
65536 progress: ~13.08% @ 97d (0y 3m 5d) [03/18/2024] {8572/65536}



:P:|:o

the2000

BREAKING NEWS:
written by Apple The Cat
jon broke his ds again
wasteof - the game of joining the game continues

<-- This is my friend dan. we are good chums
DAN FACT OF THE DAY: dan can only count to six on his hands

CatsUnited

Well this is pretty cool



YOU VIOLATED THE LAW!!!

Although most people are happy with the laws as they are now, many politicians, such as Jordan Cabula and Reeling Tur'tll suggest that 2019 new laws should be added to the 2019 edition of the Guiness Book of Pop Stahh Laws. Examples of these laws are Car Jaywalking (inappropriately crossing the street via a vehicle) and Sandsocking (the wearing of socks and sandals at the same time in public).
written by Apple the Cat



ANNOUNMENT BY SHEF KERBI
A few days ago, our team decided to start crediting who wrote the news articles again, which was a practise we used to do in the very first newsletters. More information along with your feedback will be shown in the Opionion column




BREAKING NOWS
Schools all across Dreem Lend have sent various complaints to the National Kreikeo Assembly for raining on the one week where everybody decided to schedule their athletics carnival.
written by Zeke Teddy




NEW 2019 PARASITUS NEWS

Professor Gourd-oh has discovered that 2019 parasitus is, in most cases, caused by inhaled clock dust fumes that play twister on your lungs, nose, and calendar, and can be prevented by calling a good clock cleaner, such as Keynsun DDDO, to clean your clocks for only $19.99 per clock, plus $1 if you call now!
written by Apple the Cat

officers brutally killed to death by bon starbuckle impostor!!!

A few officers and a hostage negotiator were killed to death this evening by a Bon Starbuckle imposter. "THIS IS CLEARLY [AN IMPOSTOR OF BON STARBUCKLE] WITH A GREEN HA[T!!!!!]", said the hostage negotiator moments before getting deathed by the aforementioned imposter. Shef Kerbi's team is currently tracking down the impostor, and not the police, because they're all dead. Find out more in the next edition of SKNN!
written by Apple the Cat


Now I don't wanna give my own opionion but...
OPIONION WITH SHEF KERBI AND BON STARBUCKLE

So we told you Shef Kerbi News Network fans on our Scratch page that you could post anything with the #SKNN hashtag and you could end up in our paper! In this episode, we'll respond to some of your feedback with the new SKNN format, as well as show some of your cool stuff!

robloxnoobofficial wrote:

Because you are verified, that means that your opionion is automatically valid. I'll get Apple to make the next one easier.
epbic_boi42 wrote:

Thank you, and I believe the sport is called football
TSM_Liquid_FaZe_Ninja, a regular here on the column, wrote:

I'd say Season 26 is a good update, although they did nerf the Wing copy ability, probably because it was exploited a lot by stream snipers (all of those reports about stream sniping came from you btw). The golden electric spear is probably gonan be really OP though because they buffed the damage from 116 per shot to 120. I imagine a lot of the strats used in the high kill games will use the electric spear. I also wish they'd fix the Sleep ability because that's been OP since Season 19, and it's getting a bit ridiculous. Overall though, it's a nice update, with the revisions to the map and balancing and everything

Some of our viewers have decided to submit some images as well. User taxpayer1969 sent in this picture through the fax:

MikalVsauce sent in this image from one of my personal favorite websites, boneappletea:


If you would like to submit your own opinion, just go to our social media, on Twitter, Instagram or Scratch. But prefably Scratch because that's what everyone uses

Ask Bon And Bon's Cat I'm Just Gonna Stop Numbering These
Dear Bon,
Is life pointless?
Existential Emma

the only thing pointless around here is your bad attitude, emma. go outside and read a bike. or ride a book.

Dear Bon,
can you do an improv Gornfeld strip for me?
Sincerely, a Gornfeld fan
sure kiddo. here ya goes





BREAKING NEWS:

jon broke his ds again
written by Apple The Cat


COMIX

Candy Sadness by Apple


CROSSWORD ANSWER TIME

SPORT S

Nothing much at the moment, however the SDreem KLand NSoccer NTeam is doing well.

WETHA
with Zeke Teddy
Today it's raining stay inside like you know you want to, max of 14 and min of 6
Tomorrow... it's still raining. max 12, min 5

THANK YOU FOR WATCH. PLEASE TUN E IN NEXT TIME FOR MORE NESW





Shef Kerbi News Network follows the guidelines and conventions set by the 1984 High Quality News Act of Dreem Lend, which states that any news published is to be of a high quality, is to remain unbiased and to show all sides of a news report, does not attack anyone, and protects the privacy of people whose identities don't want to be revealed.

If you would like to file a complaint regarding content use, please message SKNN through our Scratch account. We also have a Twitter and Instagram account if you prefer.

Shef Kerbi News Network respects the ancestors of Cappy Town, and understands that they are the reason why Dreem Lend exists.

Shef Kerbi News Network is proud to be a subsidiary of Shef Werld

CASH:

EXPENSES:

News broadcast: -$600
Something to do with Bon Starbuckle I don't know why: -$1500
Wages: 7 x -$400 = -$2800 // i think, not everyone is actively on the job/alive

TOTAL EXPENSES: $4900

GAIN:

Annonment x1: $0 // does nothing lol just wanted to inform everyone

News Report x5:
   The Elder Scrolls meme: +$900
   Silly cloud: +$550
   new 2019 bad: +$750
   green hat man: +$900
   jon's dual screen wii u: +$300

Total = $3400

Ads x4: $600 x 4 = $2400

Comic:
   Candy Sadness: +$1000
Total = $1000

TOTAL GAIN: $6800

PREVIOUS TOTAL MONEY FOR SKNN: $8700
TOTAL PROFIT: +$1900
NEW TOTAL MONEY FOR SKNN: $10600

the2000

can you keep us updated as to what is and what is not going to be in the newsletter and other stuff like that
wasteof - the game of joining the game continues

<-- This is my friend dan. we are good chums
DAN FACT OF THE DAY: dan can only count to six on his hands

CatsUnited

Quote from: the2000can you keep us updated as to what is and what is not going to be in the newsletter and other stuff like that
yeah ok

findanegg

Bon And Bon's Cat Give A Helpful Tip
Throw tomato cans at your vegetable garden to show them you are getting impatient.
She/they, likes collecting Stamps and playing runescape. Veteran of the Sandwich War.

the2000

Quote from: findaneggBon And Bon's Cat Give A Helpful Tip
Throw tomato cans at your vegetable garden to show them you are getting impatient.
that sounds familiar
wasteof - the game of joining the game continues

<-- This is my friend dan. we are good chums
DAN FACT OF THE DAY: dan can only count to six on his hands

realicraft

where is the scratch page
also can i make a sudoku or something
it sure is 43.250.142.151       tbgforums.com time, i think
ewow status: 1a has released yet; voting has ended
videos | FS3 | FS3 Wiki | Ratings | Calendar | Universe Manager 2 | Sandbox
65536 progress: ~13.08% @ 97d (0y 3m 5d) [03/18/2024] {8572/65536}



:P:|:o

CatsUnited

Quote from: realicraftwhere is the scratch page
also can i make a sudoku or something
1. doesn't exist, but i could make one if you want
2. sure

realicraft

Sudoku:

(also, i have the solution made, i'll give it to you next paper)
it sure is 43.250.142.151       tbgforums.com time, i think
ewow status: 1a has released yet; voting has ended
videos | FS3 | FS3 Wiki | Ratings | Calendar | Universe Manager 2 | Sandbox
65536 progress: ~13.08% @ 97d (0y 3m 5d) [03/18/2024] {8572/65536}



:P:|:o

the2000

wasteof - the game of joining the game continues

<-- This is my friend dan. we are good chums
DAN FACT OF THE DAY: dan can only count to six on his hands

NasomiXIV

Name: Somari
Gender: M
Age: -1
Past Experience: Saved the world, nobody gave even half a crap.
Occupation: Advertiser
[This area is total garbage. I can't read any of it.] Fill in this box to agree to the 46 pages of terms and conditions that Shef Kerbi himself wrote
WARNING: I am insane.
They say games are a product, rather than a service. Certainly a nice thought, however this is more fiction than truth.
Each and every day, new games are created, with most being infested with microtransactions, paid expansions, and subscription services, bogging down (or blocking off entirely) the user experience until they cough up their life savings, even after having already purchased the game. However, we as fans have remedied the problems that plague modern games through modifications and fan servers. There is, however, one last game to fix.

This is why I have changed my name. To spread awareness of what must be done. What we want. We want...NasomiXIV.

1 2

Pikachu took a vacation.