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IKEA Wars

Started by P-Code, Mar 06, 2017, 03:07:39 PM

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P-Code

This is similar to Walmart Wars, but taken to the next level: IKEA. Which means a bigger store, Swedish stuff, and delicious food!

And Allen wrenches!

Of course, usual RPing rules apply. This RPG has the same rules as Walmart Wars:

Quote from: Fusion44Self-insert.
Rules:
    All forum rules apply,
    be realistic(This means no lazer guns, plasma weapons, massive quantities of explosive, ect.) ,
    Please keep explosives down, restarting
    walmart every nine pages is not fun(You may use them in small quantitys though.
    No saying "I destroy x". You have to describe it.
    No entering with items.

Dino

FOOD FIGHT

Do we start now or later?

NuclearArmadillo

#3
Nuke hides out in the food court, stores all the food in the kitchen, locks up, and prepares for the long game.
Oh yeah and he also gets 2 chef knives.
[removed by moderator - inappropriate]

Dino

Dino attempts to climb over the food glass to reach the kitchen.

Tymewalk

I walk in, holding my trusty Allen wrench and Lingonberry jam.

I offer some tips to future brawlers:
 - Need quick fake IKEA product names? They're just Swedish, Norwegian, and Danish cities!)
 - Google Translate is your friend!
 - å, ä, ö, Å, Ä, Ö. For söunding möre Swedish thån you äre.
 - Make sure to use those trusty allen wrenches. I've built entire tanks using just plywood and allen wrenches.
 - Get creative, this is IKEA, and you can do just about whatever you want.
 - The children's section counts, too!
Whosoever holds this banhammer, if he be worthy, shall possess the power of moderaThor...
he/him | Text Based Games Forums Discord Server | Just Dance 2014 | (つo.o)つ It's Kirby!
back on the road, back down the road, downtown, i don't have courage but i have something else - and it's more than words

P-Code

Quote from: jji10dinoFOOD FIGHT

Do we start now or later?

Oh it's on!

I "accidently" spill hot coffee on you.

NuclearArmadillo

Nuke runs away with the entire knife block, the food can wait.
He heads towards the bikes, and finds one to ride. (Yes, they have bikes)
[removed by moderator - inappropriate]

Dino

Dino finds a bunch of knives in the kitchen and throws them at P-Code!

Tymewalk

Quote from: P-Code
Quote from: jji10dinoFOOD FIGHT

Do we start now or later?

Oh it's on!

I "accidently" spill hot coffee on you.
I just flat out toss a tray of meatballs at you.

What? This is IKEA Wars, it's not like I'm pretending I'm NOT going to try and hurt people.
Whosoever holds this banhammer, if he be worthy, shall possess the power of moderaThor...
he/him | Text Based Games Forums Discord Server | Just Dance 2014 | (つo.o)つ It's Kirby!
back on the road, back down the road, downtown, i don't have courage but i have something else - and it's more than words

P-Code

Never mind the food fight, I'm out of the kitchen, taking several trays with me.

I find Nuke and throw a tray directly at his bike.

Dino

Dino throws his next few knives at Tymewalk.

NuclearArmadillo

#12
Nuke Takes to the glass section and begins his nest by lining the perimeter with glass
He then realizes he's bottlenecked himself and quickly dashes away on his bike, popping the back tire.
[removed by moderator - inappropriate]

Tymewalk

TIME TO ALLEN WRENCH THIS UP!

I grab my trusty allen wrench and begin building the Snabbbränningkulspruta.

"Step 5... attach turret to pivoting base, and secure with 4 screws."
According to GT, "Snabb bränning kulspruta" means "Rapid firing machine gun". Sadly, I do not currently speak Swedish.
Whosoever holds this banhammer, if he be worthy, shall possess the power of moderaThor...
he/him | Text Based Games Forums Discord Server | Just Dance 2014 | (つo.o)つ It's Kirby!
back on the road, back down the road, downtown, i don't have courage but i have something else - and it's more than words

NuclearArmadillo

I combine wood planks, a hammock, and some umbrella poles into a ballista.
I mount it on top of an office chair and begins winding it up with a handy dandy mini-drill. This might take a while.
[removed by moderator - inappropriate]

Tymewalk

Boom! One machine gun, all set up.

I load some splintered planks as ammo and begin firing at Nuke.
Whosoever holds this banhammer, if he be worthy, shall possess the power of moderaThor...
he/him | Text Based Games Forums Discord Server | Just Dance 2014 | (つo.o)つ It's Kirby!
back on the road, back down the road, downtown, i don't have courage but i have something else - and it's more than words

NuclearArmadillo

REK TYME'S MACHINE GUN WITH MY BALLISTA

begin rolling away on the office chair while winding up the balista again
[removed by moderator - inappropriate]

Tymewalk

ph-THWICK

Darn plywood.

I arm myself with a large chair and create padded armor out of pillows.

Come at me, bro!
Whosoever holds this banhammer, if he be worthy, shall possess the power of moderaThor...
he/him | Text Based Games Forums Discord Server | Just Dance 2014 | (つo.o)つ It's Kirby!
back on the road, back down the road, downtown, i don't have courage but i have something else - and it's more than words

NuclearArmadillo

CLOTH, MY ONLY WEAKNESS
I begin sanding down the edges on the umbrella pole to pierce pillow
[removed by moderator - inappropriate]

Karanrimé

I am way off to the other side of the store, as I put together a large armored walking stick.
The human(?) previously known on this site as ChildGamer

[under construction]

;

Tymewalk

Oh, nice try, Nuke.

I begin replacing my pillow armor with some of that... is it plywood? Whatever the wood in these things is made of.

I then toss my chair at Nuke.
Whosoever holds this banhammer, if he be worthy, shall possess the power of moderaThor...
he/him | Text Based Games Forums Discord Server | Just Dance 2014 | (つo.o)つ It's Kirby!
back on the road, back down the road, downtown, i don't have courage but i have something else - and it's more than words

Shpore


Wolfslime123

I walk in, see the chaos and dive under a table, grabbing its corresponding chair.
Yours Truly,
\\/\/

Karanrimé

Oh wait- It's fitted with spikes.
The human(?) previously known on this site as ChildGamer

[under construction]

;

Wolfslime123

I find Tyme and smash his head with my chair.
Yours Truly,
\\/\/

Epicness123

I look around the store for something I can make to kill myself with
au
tbger since 2013